he stood admiring this beauty
succumbed to his handiwork
and he smiled as he watched her expressions shift
wondering what was next
he meant to leave her there
but then chose to drink in and savor that which
he so wished to taunt and taste and take
he would in due time, but first
he knelt and whispered to her
things he was deciding to do
to her perfectly vulnerable nakedness
and as he mentioned supping the juice of berries and cream
from her every curve and crevice
he watched her blush and rub her thighs like a singing cricket
he oozed more voluptuous ideas through her pulsating eardrum
of toys and wax and ice and voyeurs
and in noting each reaction
he so concocted the erotic symphony of this evening
the last thing he whispered was
“I will take you in ways you’ve never imagined
and by the end
you will beg me to do this again and again”
she gasped, having no doubt
and just then felt the first rivulet of her flushed honey
drizzling from her salivating cunt
Wow - words from Wild Ride again.
Master talks of how he will tie me and blindfold me.
I informed Master how Mistress LR had said she wants me to sit in front of the mirror and watch myself climax. She then wanted me to write to her of my experience. Master commented on how he admired her imagination. He reminded me of his desire to have me sit in front of the mirror whilst he sits behind me.
He watches me as I watch myself playing. Master will instruct me what to do. He will place his cock between my buttocks.
Master is so creative and his ideas excite me. As soon as Master started to tell me what to do I was dripping wet. His hands moving over my body, holding my heavy breasts and pinching my nipples. Oh God! Everything so sensuous and all the while me watching myself. How exposed I feel. Master as always had control of my orgasm telling me to bring myself closer and closer but to keep playing with myself. Holding me at that point. God the delight not wanting to go over the edge and yet yearning to feel the release of my orgasm. Keep playing his whispered, keep playing. His breathing in my ear. Keep playing. Mmmmmmm. I wasn't sure how long I could stay there. Master said that this is what I must practice and learn. And then he said "cum. Cum for me! Cum!" Man! I gushed in climax, my body jerking like it had never done before. Master noted that he had not seen me cum like that before. He thanked me. I absolutely thanked him for giving me such an orgasm. It was so late but Master allowed me to play with his cock - sucking him and playing with him, despite feeling so spent and then he came too. It was so so late and we were both so tired.
He called me into his arms to snuggle into his chest. Masters strong arms wrapped around me and we fell asleep.
Master has told me to tell Mistress LR that I am not available to her. I sent her a message. A little afraid too. I do not wish her to become angry with me. And I hope that we might be able to remain friends although I am not visiting SL for the time being.
Mistress LR asked to know my Masters name so that she might apologise for wanting to take me as her slave. I said that I would ask Master if I should give his name. I am concerned though. I know that she wants what she wants. I sense that she could be very destructive and I would prefer not to continue with this for a while now.
Master asked me if I would like to go there with him. Well I said that I thought it important that I remained clear of SL entirely for a while. However the thought of going together was of course appealing. I like so many things about SL. But how easily tempted am. I wish to commit to having a relationship with Master in RL only right now. Despite being open and honest and me not role playing, there is an avatar between us.
Love and slavery cuts across the physical distance between us when we are close and I would like to nurture that in me.
This afternoon Master and I had a discussion about things related to relatedness. It was a general conversation on my part. I truly want to understand things better. Understand Master better of the things he is happy for me to understand.
At some point I noticed that Master seemed displeased and learnt from him that he thought I was making a point with my questions. I truly was not. Just exploring ideas and beliefs about situations past and current.
As we discussed this issue itself further Master said that he felt questioned and needed to defend himself. I did not ever intend Master to need to defend himself. He seemed irritated by my questions and discussion
It then escalated and I asked him about the contact he might have had recently with a woman he had once liked very much, even perhaps romantically in my words - maybe not his words. He said he had had contact. Oh gosh it was hard from then on. I asked questions which Master seemed to not answer. It was now out of M/s relationship for certain and definitely lovers talking - well from my part.
I was trying to be open and honest and explained that I was not trying to criticise or demand but merely asking questions that might help to understand and that his response of not directly answering seemed to create in me concern.
Master, my love explained then how guilt was so easily provoked even when not guilty. Well I think that is what he explained when he said that he feels guilty and blushes when someone else farts in the room. And then when someone says well you must have farted at some point to know that guilt, he has not and yet still feels the guilt. I understand what he is saying. He thinks he is in the wrong when questions are asked even when he is not.
We discussed and mulled over our understandings of each other and the situation too. Our love is great of that I am sure. I requested his help. I requested that whilst I get accustomed to his contact with this person he would tell me when they have been in contact with each other. It is not to change anything but just so that I am sort of in the loop really. It's not ideal but I think it may be away of me normalising things. I asked if he was able to do this respecting whatever choice and depending on what he was able to do means that I can learn what is OK for me or not too. I never ever want to make someone change. If they can support me and my own issues then that surely is a way forward. If Master, my Love cannot support me in this way I am not sure how I go forward.
It is another little hurdle for me to overcome. He said that she is back in her own country and also that he might expect more contact with her. Well this is difficult for me. On a practical level I can see that if he loves me his relationship with her will undoubtedly have altered. She knows about me.
Gosh I asked if he would be happy to show me the written message he sent her. He said instantly that I don't trust him. Well I wonder how the exchanges between them are for certain. Yes I really do wonder - are they affectionate and sexy with each other? Are they simply friendly? Is it flirty or not? I truly would like to know but it's really none of my business I guess.
I just want to learn how to get through these insecurities and I hope that Master can help me. I look forward to knowing him and feeling assured of his dependability. Love is in the behaviour and I am regularly reminded that we are still in early days of getting to know each other.
And in many ways we have examples of dependability.
God! It's so painful. It hurts deep inside me. Yet I also know it's learning and growth which I embrace fully.
I love being in a loving relationship. I truly have never known anyone like Master. I have never been able to be loving or be loved like this. I am a different me too. But still a baby at this thing.
I can write forever about all of this ................... one day at a time.
I have at least completed some revision today. If only I had had this energy before now. I have needed rest time. I am aware how much my work takes out of me and the implausible situation. I need at least 15 hours per week. I do not have enough time to take in rest time, work and social time too with study on top. I do not know what I can do next year.
I am hoping that Master and I can bring into fruition plans to be together which will alter the direction of my journey yet again.
He has suggested I explore study in his city. It might be possible but goodness knows how to make ends meet financially. All things to be explored to see how feasible anything is.
Gosh! I am realising how insecure I am feeling right now. I will do a little more studying whilst I await Master. Master said he will summon me after 8pm. It's long after 8pm now. I fill in the gaps with an over active imagination.
I imagine he is angry with me from earlier or even sad. I imagine he is on SL or talking with another woman. All the things that terrify me - not because of the actions per se but the act of not being open. This is certainly not him this is me and my crazy flipping thinking all triggered after today. Also the communication with Mistress LR has contributed. I think now they will seek each other out! Oh thoughts shut up!
If only I just put everything into some creative writing instead of getting myself wound up.
If mAster reads this he is sure to be irritated by me. So it's good to clear it out now somehow.
Study whilst waiting - great idea!
Bliss
XXXXXX
